Random Funny YuGiOh Things
by Black Egyptian Dragon
Summary: Yami, Yugi, and the rest of the gang are way more funnier then meets the eye. Pure funny randomness.
1. Chapter 1:I have come to!

**I'm coming to show you my knifes!**

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Disclaimer: I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh!

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Bakura, Yami, Ryou, Seto, Joey, and Yugi sat in a circle. Yugi was sitting contently in Yami's lap playing with one of his golden rod bangs.

"Ra! I am so bored!" Yami complained.

"For once, I'll agree with you Pharaoh." Seto and Bakura said at the same time before glaring at each other. "Stop copying me!" the yelled at each other, again at the same time. The started a war on that, leaving Yami, Joey, Ryou, and Yugi bored and out of the fight.

"Lets play truth or dare!" Yugi chirped.

Joey and Ryou nodded in agreement as Yami smiled.

"Okay! I call first!" Yami said. Yami thought for a moment. "Joey! Truth or dare!"

"Dare!" Joey said with a confidant smirk.

"I dare you to go dance around the block in your boxers!" Yami dared. Seto stopped instantly.

"I'd like to see that!" Seto said as he smirked at his lover.

Joey gulped. "Okay." Joey stripped down to his boxers and ran out the door, Seto on his heels.

"Okay. Who is next seeing as Joey and Seto won't be back for a while?" Yami asked.

"Me! Me! Me!" Ryou squealed. "Okay. Umm... Bakura! Truth or dare?"

"Truth."

"What creeps you out the most?"

"Yugi's and the baka Pharaoh's hair. I mean come on! Don't you think it is creepy that their hair is three different colors?" Bakura said.

Yugi and Yami frowned and stared blankly at Bakura.

"What?"

"Just go." Yami murmured.

"Pharaoh. Truth or dare?"

"Truth. I don't trust you with dare."

"Damn you! Any way. Have you ever made out with any one?" Bakura asked with a smirk.

Yami blushed at bit and looked down at Yugi who was blushing also. "Yes."

"Who?"

"'Have you ever made out with any one' is the only question you got Bakura." Yami snapped.

Bakura frowned. "Dang you Pharaoh."

"My turn. Yugi. Truth or dare?"

"Truth."

"Hmm... what was the most evil and cruel thing you have ever done to any one?"

Yugi tapped his chin lightly before thinking back.

-Flash back-

_Yugi chewed at his gum. Bored to death at the movie Anzu had dragged him into. _

I am so bored. _Yugi thought. His gum ran out of flavor just then. _Hmm.. Where do I put this? _Yugi asked himself and saw the man in front of him. A bald scalp called out to Yugi._

"_Put the gum on me! Put the gum on me!" it called in a very high pitched tone. Yugi looked around him, Anzu was balling her eyes out and the guy next to him had fallen asleep. Yugi spat out the white flavorless gum out and quickly stuck it to the man's head._

-Flash back ends-

"I uh... stuck gum on a bald guy's head." Yugi said looking down.

"How is that evil?" Bakura barked.

"His head got stuck to the chair."

"Oh... Not as innocent as you seem Yugi." Bakura said.

"Okay... Yami. Truth or dare?"

"Dare."

"I dare you to prank call some one and tell them what ever pops into your head."

Yami nodded and picked up the phone, dialing a random number.

"Hello?" answered an old lady.

"I'm coming to show you my knifes!" Yami said through the phone at the old lady. He heard an eep and a thump before he hung up. "All done!"

Yugi, Barkura, and Ryou laughed.

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BE Dragon: .:giggling:. Thank you mom for giving me the idea for this! You see, my brother's friend is selling knifes and my mom said for him to call up his friends and say: "I'm coming to show you my knifes!" Please review! .:smiles:.


	2. Chapter 2:Were your dropped on the head?

**Were you dropped on your head as a baby?

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**Disclaimer: **I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh

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After a while Seto and Joey came back. Joey's face had a light blush over it while Seto had a smug smirk on.

Yami handed Joey back his cloths and Joey quickly changed and sat down.

They all were going to continue with the game when...

Knock. Knock.

"The door is open!" Yami called.

The door bust open and Marik jumped in and did a dramatic Superman pose. Malik was behind him making the end of his jacket wave like if air was under it.

"Have no fear we are here!" Marik said while the Superman music played.

Every one stared at them with anime sweat drops. The only thing that was heard were crickets.

"Anyway!" Yami said as they all turned back to the game.

Marik and Malik stared at each other and shrugged as they sat down in the circle.

"Okay. Who's turn was it last?" Yami asked.

"Your's you idiot." Bakura sneered.

"Oh yeah! Umm... Bakura, truth or dare?"

"Truth you baka!"

"Were you dropped on your head as a baby?" Yami asked blindly with a smirk.

Bakura had a blank expression on his face before he fell backwards landing on his back. He sat up suddenly and yelled "WHAT?" in Yami's face.

"Were. You. Dropped. On. Your. Head. When. You. Were. A. Baby?" Yami asked, exaggerating every word.

Bakura's eyes twitched. "NO!"

"Okay." Yami said with a smile. "Your turn."

Bakura made a 'hmp' and thought for a moment... "Kaiba; truth or dare?"

Kaiba frowned. "Dare."

Bakura smirked very evily. "I dare you to stand on a street corner with a sign that says: 'Will work to beat Yami'."

Kaiba stood up. "HELL NO!" he yelled.

"You have to. You picked dare."

Kaiba frowned and pulled out a poster board and wrote 'Will work to beat Yami' on it with a big black marker and went outside.

Everyone stumbled to the door and watched as Seto stood at the corner with the sign, and of course laughed while Ryou recorded it.

"Okay since Kaiba is busy with that dare; who's turn is it going to be?" Ryou asked.

"Hmm... my turn!" Malik called as he stood up.

Bakura frowned. "Hurry up tomb keeper." he muttered.

"Bakura! Truth or dare?"

"Dare. Hey, wait, why is everyone picking on me?"

"Because it is fun, and I dare you to dress up like a brownies cookie scout girl."

"Fine." he muttered. "Does any one have such an infernal outfit?"

Yugi blinked before rushing up stairs and coming back with the outfit. "Here you go!"

"How come you have this?" Joey asked.

"It was my Halloween costume." Yugi said.

Bakura went into the bathroom and came back dressed in a brown, short skirt with a brown jacket. An orange shirt could be seen under it along with an orange handkerchief and brown cowboy hat.

Yami burst out laughing at the sight. The skirt was so short and the socks and shoes were small for him and showed his rather fuzzy legs.

Bakura's eye twitched and he took off his shoe and threw it at Yami, but sadly, Yami doged it and just went on laughing his ass off.

Bakura sat down next to Ryou. "This makes it my turn now... hm..." he looked around the room, his eyes landing on Ryou. A smirk graced his lips.

Ryou looked up and saw Bakura's smirk and he gulped. _I'm dead._ He thought in his mind.

"Ryou... truth or dare?"

"T-truth."

"Good. What was the most perverted thing you had ever done?"

Ryou thought a moment.

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**flash back**

Ryou looked around the café he was in when his eyes landed on a girl's rather large ass. _I wonder if it is bouncy..._ he thought with no conscious.

As the girl walked past he smacked it.

"AWH!" the girl looked back, face deep red with anger and embarrassment.

SLAP!

_Yup... it was bouncy... ouch._

**Flash back ends

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Bakura, Yami, Yugi, Marik, Malik, and Joey all stared at him.

Yami's eyes went from Yugi, to Ryou, to Marik and Malik, to Joey and Bakura. "Was it really _that_ big that you _had_ to smack it? And was it really bouncy?" Yami asked out of no where.

Everyone looked at him.

"Oh come on! I know you guys were wondering too!"

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—**After getting some pizza and Bakura terrorizing the delivery boy— **

Yami and the others snacked on the pizza that Bakura got for "free".

"Okay Ryou. It is you turn."

Ryou nodded placing his slice of pepperoni pizza on his plate and dusting off his hands. "Mmk. Lets see. I chose to do a double thingy, may I?"

Yami and Yugi and the rest nodded. "Sure why not."

Ryou smiled. "Yami and Yugi. Truth or dare?"

"Truth." they both said at the same time.

"Okay. Do you really believe in the 'heart of the cards'?"

Yami was the first to speak. "Nope. Takahashi didn't have any thing else to say that didn't include friendship and make all his reviewers want to burn his mangas and such. So yep. He just gave us the line and we said it."

Yugi nodded nervously. "Yup. And trust me. Cards do _not_ have hearts.." he sniffed. "Poor poor Thunder Kid."

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**BE Dragon: I know. It is really sort. " I haven't updated in a while so I just ended it here so I could start on my other Fanfics. Perpare!**

**Thank you so much The Female Pharaoh so much for the ideas! Thanks you all for reviewing and reading!**


	3. Chapter 3: I AM!

**I AM GODZILLA!

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**Disclaimer: Now, if I owned YGO, Seto and Joey would be together, Yami and Yugi would be happily married, Grandpa would be as happy as hell, Anzu wouldn't preach so much(no offence!), and all this funniness would exist in the series and I would have put in that kiss from Yami and Yugi that every fan girl wanted!**

**But I don't so, eh. I don't own YGO.

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**BE Dragon: This is going to be a rather short chapter. But I'm trying to update everything this weekend, which I am failing at. . Wish me luck!

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Yami and Yugi walked in the green park with smiles on both their faces as children ran around, each wearing some funky cone hat with different designs.

"Hey Yami, isn't that funny?" Yugi asked, watching the kids play around.

Yami nodded. "Yup." his crimson red eyes looked over them till they landed on a little boy who was crying. The boy's face was cherry red and tear streaks lined his face. On his head was a different kind of hat, it sort of looked like a king's crown, but made of paper.

"I WANT GODZILLA!"

"I'm sorry son, but Godzilla can't make it.." the father tried to calm down his son, looking around nervously.

"I WANT GODZILLA!" the boy continued to scream and cry, kicking the ground and taking shots at trying to hit his dad with balled up fists.

Yami and Yugi watched in pity.

Yugi looked up at Yami and smirked before pulling out a chair and lamp out of no where. Stepping on top of the chair, he placed the lamp over Yami's head and turned it on.

BING!

Yami's crimson eyes lit up. "I have an idea!"

"I know honey." Yugi said sweetly, putting back the chair and lamp as he smiled innocently to his darker.

Yami pulled out his sunglasses and placed them on. He smiled brightly to Yugi. "They make me look cool." he said before walking up to the man. "Excuse me sir! I'm Godzilla's agent." he said in a fake English accent.

The man looked at Yami like if he was psycho, not that he isn't. But he certainly seemed it.

The little boy's green eye lit up. "_You_ know _Godzilla_?" he said in a 'I don't believe it' tone.

"I reckon I do." Yami said, now switching to a Southwestern accent.

The boy squealed.

"'nd I reckon I c'n git ol' Godzilla ta call yer daddy on his cell phone!" Yami looked over to the man and switched to his English accent. "If that _is_ very good with you?"

The man nodded in almost pure horror at the way Yami was acting before writing down his cell number and giving it to Yami with a shaky hand.

Yami bowed to the man and turned to the kid again and pushed a golden rod bang up. ""ll see ya later, partner!" he said before running off. As he passed Yugi, he pulled him along behind a tree. "Watch this!" he said in his normal voice. "I'm going to make a kid's day!" he added, dialing the number.

Riiing Riii-

"Hello?" squealed the little boy.

Yami cleared his throat and made it go even deeper. "I AM GODZILLA!"

The boy squealed. "REALLY?"

"OF COURSE I AM! I AM GODZILLA!"

Again he squealed. "Do it again! Do it again!"

"I AM GODZILLA!"

And so it went for an hour...

"I... am... Godzilla.." Yami said tiredly.

"DO IT AGAIN! AGAIN!" the boy squealed on the other end of the call.

"Listen kid. I'm tired–"

"NO! AGAIN! AGAIN!"

"LISTEN KID! IF YOU DON'T LET GODZILLA TAKE A BREAK, GODZILLA GONNA GO AND EAT YOUR TOYS AND CAKE! ICE CREAM TOO!"

The boy screamed and hung up.

Yami grinned. "I did I good deed today."

And Yugi just slapped his forehead with his palm. "Yami... nah, I won't even try." he muttered. "Lets go home."

And so that little kid never did like Godzilla as much as he did before...

As for Yami...

He dressed up as Godzilla for Halloween that year.

"I'M GODZILLA!"

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**BE Dragon: **YAY! Now that I know the loop-hole in this updating thing, I can update! YAY! If you are having trouble updating, feel free to PM me asking how to update. 

Review please!


	4. Chapter 4: I NEVER HAD!

**I'VE NEVER HAD–!**

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**BE Dragon: **So ya'll know. Everything funny I write here, has either happened to me, a friend, or my family. XD So it is all genuine and fresh!

This one is brought to you by my dear old brother!

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**Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh Or United Blood Services!**

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_Yugi Muoto_ an eighteen year old, first year college student sighed as he relaxed and started to flip through a hand book he was given from the United Blood Services. He had gone by there to get tested to see if he could donate blood, seeing as he was the right age and weight.

As he flipped through it, something caught his eye..

"_United Blood Services will only call you if you have a sexual diseases, AIDS, HIV, Ect, Etc."_

Yugi chuckled innocently. "It is a good thing that Yami nor I have had sex yet, and that neither of us have it." his large amethyst eyes skimming through the book.

Suddenly, the phone rang and Yugi reached over and grabbed it. He looked at the ID and it said: "Caller ID Unknown". Blinking, he pressed the 'talk' button.

"Hello?"

"Hello. This is Karen from United Blood Services..." e heard a sweet voice of a young woman say.

Yugi's heart raced and his large eyes grew the size of plates as he thought, _BUT I HAVEN'T HAD ANY SEXUAL CONFRONTATION!_

"We are calling to see if you would like to donate platelets seeing as you have over the average platelets."

As soon as he heard if he would donate platelets, Yugi passed out.

"Uhh.. Sir? Hello? Sir?"

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**BE Dragon: **Okay, my brother didn't pass out, but he freaked out like hell. Lol. Review please! 


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